Heyer Capital, LLC

investment management and timely advice from a local CPA (Fox Valley, Wisc.)

be careful what you ask retired people

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“Yesterday I was at my favorite local supermarket buying a large bag of dog chow for my loyal pet, Biscuit, the Wonder Dog and was in the checkout line when woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

“What did she think I had, an elephant?

“Well, since I’m retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn’t have a dog, I was starting the Dog Chow Diet again. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with chow nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again.

“I added that I probably shouldn’t, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I’d lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

“(I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

“Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me.

“I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter’s butt and a car hit us both.”

h/t:  Backwoods Home Magazine

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Written by heyercapital

August 28, 2009 at 2:28 pm

Posted in Uncategorized

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